Cry little sister, you shall not fall
by forevermore16
Summary: AU: Sam was born a girl. Dean is having problems with dealing with his feelings for his little sister. Warning: Wincest. Don't read if you don't like it.
1. Chapter 1

_**Disclaimer: I do not in any way owe Supernatural or any characters from the show. I do wish I owned Sam and Dean though. (Evil grin) This story is about Sam and Dean of course, but a little different. Sam in my story is a girl. Yes, I just committed gengerswap. The story takes place when Sam is fourteen and Dean 17. This is wincest boys and girls. If you don't like it don't read it. I am all for male on male action but after reading a fic where Sam turns into a girl I got obsessed with the whole subject. Please review good or bad!**_

_Beep, beep, beep!_ The alarm clock screeched as I lazily tried to turn the annoying thing off. Tapping the button, well more like slamming it I shut it off. I hopped out of bed, making my way to the small cramped bathroom. The _Comfy Turtle Motel_ seems not to care if their establishment is all that combatable. The peach tiles were cracked on floor and the green tacky wallpaper was starting to peel. This place was a dump. I can't believe we have to stay here for two whole months!

This will be the longest we stayed in one place since like ever! Dad had just picked up his duffel bag and left but not before telling Dean to watch out for his little sister. He is always saying, "Watch out for Sammy, boy!" His gruff stern voice always pierces my ears. He makes me so livid sometime no one can even imagine!

Since my mom was killed by a monster he wasn't the same. Well, that is what Dean told me at least. I remember when I was eight years old my big brother told me that the things in the closet are real and you should always be afraid of the dark. Sometimes I wish I didn't know such things. I yearned for the slice of a normal apple pie life where I didn't grow up into a family of hunters. Okay, it is pretty cool to have a dad that is sort of a super hero but he is never around, never there for me but Dean is.

When I told him that I wanted to be a lawyer when I grow up he told me in his usual gruff voice, "You can't leave your family. We stick together. You will become a hunter like me and your brother and I won't discuss this anymore with you." I tried my best to argue but he just walked away from me shaking his head. Any other parent would be proud if their daughter wanted to be a high shot lawyer but not my dad. After I told him my dreams and hopes for my future he schooled me extra hard on how to become a hunter. I could take apart a rifle less in sixty seconds. I was extremely skilled with knives. I could throw a knife better then Dean and he hated that. Last summer I went on my first hunt with dad and Dean. We were hunting a pack of werewolves in Minnesota. I felt bad for them. It wasn't their fault they were turned into a monstrous creature. I shot a young boy in the head with a silver bullet ending him from his condition forever sending him to a timeless sleep. I told myself I did that boy a favor but I can't from feeling like a terrible person.

I stood looking at myself in the dusty mirror. My big brown eyes stood back at me. I guess you could say I'm a pretty girl perhaps even beautiful but I didn't see the point of dolling myself up. I am not a normal girl and I do not have a normal family so why pretend. I brushed my teeth and pulled my long wavy brown hair into a pony tail. I slipped on my jeans and blue checkerboard shirt. The shirt didn't pass my stomach as it was suppose to but instead it stopped right below my bellybutton. Damn my growth spurts! This was the only clean shirt I had left and I don't have time to go a laundry mat and wash another one before school. Maybe no one will notice and by no one I mean Dean. I was not in the mood this morning being lectured too. It is my first day of high school. I was so nervous I was having butterflies in the pit of my stomach and these butterflies seemed to bite.

I wasn't going to panic. It is a new year at a new school and I was going to make the best of it even though I will be in another school with different teachers filled with different 9th grader in two months. That is the story of my life, constantly traveling never staying in one place. I am always the new kid, the freak wherever I go. I can't let it get to me at least not today. I stepped out the small bathroom and Dean was there waiting to get as he rubbed his sleepy eyes.

"Bathroom is all yours Jerk" I sad playfully giving him a smile.

"Took you long enough bitch" He teased back. Dean would never call me a bitch or any type of bad name unless we were playing even when I deserved it.

He left out a big yawn as he stretched his muscular arms. My brother was handsome and sure enough he knew it and made everyone else aware that he did. He is cocky and a smartass but I love him more than anything even more then unicorns. I never forgave him though for telling me that they weren't real. If all the things that go bump in the night are real why can't unicorns be! He felt bad afterwards since I gave him my puppy dog eyes and pouty lip. He takes care of me though and is more of a father to me than dad could ever be.

He went to the bathroom and after ten minutes he came out fully dressed and wide awake. He was wearing his brown leather jacket that used to be Dad's with a navy blue shirt and jeans. I grabbed my somewhat tatter book bag to head out the door but before I could I felt a hand on my shoulder spinning me around.

Dean was facing me with a grim look on his face. The scrawl he gave me look scary even painful. What have I done this time? I thought. He couldn't possibly know about that beer I stolen from the fridge last night. Well, could he? I didn't even like the damn thing and ended up throwing the rest out.

"Where do you think you are going dressed like that?" His voice was stern and gruff like dad's but never harsh not even now he sounded more furious then anything.

"What Dean I don't know what you are talking about!" I spat.

"I am talking about your fucking shirt! You look like a child prostitute." His voice became louder and even more furious.

"You are being preposterous. I do not look like a child prostitute! I see you with girls all the time that wear hardly anything and you don't mind seeing them."

"They aren't my little sister! You are my Sammy and no guy is going to look at you with your stomach showing so go and change before we are late for the first day of school." He gave me a death glare and I gave one back but I knew there was no point of arguing he would win and we would be late for first period.

"Fine you win I will wear something dirty. Don't come complaining to me when I smell bad!" I stomped my way back in to the bathroom and got a grey t-shirt out of the dirty clothes pile. I unbuttoned my blue checkerboard flannel and threw it the trash. Dean was right it was way too short but it wasn't like I was busting out of it or anything. Well. That would never happen since I hardly have any breast to speak of. I am almost fifteen and I haven't hit puberty yet I just keep getting taller. I slip the grey t-shirt over my head and went out of the bathroom stomping even louder than before never making eye contact with my big brother.

The car ride to _Coral Reef High School_ was soundless. If there were crickets inside of the vehicle you would them chirping away. Dad left Dean the Impala so we could get to school much easier since the bus didn't make stops at motels, especially to a dump like ours. Dean kept staring at me going back and forth from the road to me. I could tell that he regrets what he said. I don't know what possibly came over him. Dean never calls me names unless we are just joking around. What he said hurt even though it was true. I did look like a child prostitute because I sure hell didn't look like a fully grown woman. I still had baby like cheeks and my dimple didn't help to make me look any older.

We pulled into the parking lot and a group of teenage girls stood talking about something stupid like shoes or makeup. I pulled my book bag over my left should and headed to the front of the brick building. Dean stopped me half way there.

"I am sorry I shouldn't have sad that." He was truly sorry I could tell by the remorse in his voice.

"It is okay. I forgive you for binging preposterous." I said giving him a big wide smile.

"Sammy, stop using that word. Can't you just say stupid? He gave me a slight shove as he laughed.

"Nope", was all I said as we broke paths and headed to our classes.

I had trouble finding 9th grade English but I manage with the help of Brian. I met him while I was walking around in circles in the long hallway with a bewildered look on my face. He happened to be in the same class as I was. We walked in Ms. Brown's English class and she had a constipated look on her face. Her hair was blonde, well the napping wig she wore was. She had a brown stain on her white shirt and her long socks didn't match.

"Ms. Brown, this is Samantha Winchester." Brian said smoothly. He was kind of cute in that dork sort of way. He was really sweet from what I could. We started talking on our way to class. He plays the trumpet which is pretty cool I guess. He has five sisters and loves Spider man. He was tall and lanky and pretty much awkward all way around but he was fun to talk to. Perhaps I just made a friend at my new school. The feeling made me smile inside. He was a little weird and so was I. This friendship could work maybe he likes unicorns too!

"Oh, Samantha I have been expecting you." Her voice was like knives stabbing at my ears. How can someone have such a pitch voice?

"It's Sam." I said shyly. I didn't want to be rude but I did not want to be called Samantha for two months either.

"Samantha is your given name so I will call you Samantha. You can take a seat next to Brian, Samantha." She gave me a smug smile as she watched me take my seat in defeat. I sat in the hard wooden desk glaring at Ms. Brown. All I had to do was tell Dean she was being mean to me and he would handle her but I won't do that no matter how much I want to. Just be nice and do well and she will lighten up I told myself. Part of me wished she was some sort of monster so I could take out of butterfly knife that was hidden in my boot and destroy this teacher from hell. Damn I was hanging out with my brother was too much.

My other four teachers weren't as bad they, were practically saints compared to Ms. Brown. Brian was in all of my classes except one which was PE. Apparently this school didn't believe in mixing up the sexes when it came to physical fitness. Today went pretty well if you exclude first period. The school was a nice enough and Brian seems to be a very good friend candidate. Well actually he seems to be all the way moved up to friend status. We got to talking about mythological creatures and folklore during lunch. It seems I am not the only geek when it comes to that stuff. Sure, he thinks it is all stories but that doesn't lessen his enthusiasm about it. Unicorns came up in the conversation and he admitted that he found them beautiful and fascinating creatures. After that I decided he was going to be my best friend.

Brian and I walked slowly to my locker as we talked about instruments. I always wanted to learn how to play an instrument, any instrument would do. "I could teach you how to play the trumpet." He said with an awkward smile.

"Yeah that would be cool." I said as I took my used school books from my locker and placed them neatly in my book bag. "Can I come over your house Saturday?" I asked hoping he would say yes.

"Sure I will ask my mom to bake cookie." He wrote down his address on an index card that he had in shirt pocket. I was so excited that I didn't notice Dean staring at us across the hall with a Blonde girl hanging on his arm until Brian said something.

"You know that guy is staring at us. I haven't seen him before he looks like a senior." He said in almost a whisper. He most of felt frighten my brother was glaring at poor Brian. He didn't take his green off us even as the blonde girl started kissing his neck right in the middle of the school hallway. This is a place of learning not a brothel. Dean is always hanging around girls like her and they seem to love Dean. I rolled my eyes at my big brother. Didn't he know he was scaring my friend, my only friend!

"That's my brother, Dean." I mumbled under my breath. Brian still seemed to hear me since he shook his head in recognition.

Dean walked towards us leaving the slut that was on his arm behind. She made a frustrated sound and walked off making loud clicks on the title floor with her heels. Dean had another scrawl on his face. It was the same face he had this morning. Something was up with him and when Dean was upset or bothered about anything it was never good for anyone practically to the person he is with and that person is always me!

"Come on Sammy we are going home." He grabbed my back pack and headed to the Impala but not before look Brian up and down like he was a monster that he was about to hunt. I waved goodbye and followed after Dean. The car ride back to our motel was silent just as it was going to school. He didn't bother turning on any music he just seemed to be thinking very hard, on what I didn't know. I was determined to find out though.

"Dean what is the matter? Didn't you have a good day at school? You seemed to have enjoyed it. You had that girl sucking on your neck. You always love finding the hot chicks on our first day of school." I gave him my puppy dog eyes hoping that would make him spill what was bothering him. I hate to see my big brother upset. We have always been like that. If one was hurting the other was too.

"It is nothing. I just hated my teachers." He said never taking his eyes off the road. He knew if he looked at my face he would spill his guts and more. I guess he didn't want me to know. I could tell he was lying and it hurt. We told each other everything. Dean even tells me about all of his conquest and there are many! The boy gets more play then a play ground. I on the other hand haven't had my first kiss and I don't think I ever want to be kiss. I decided to drop the subject and bring up something different.

"I met a friend today. We have a lot in common. He is going to teach me how to play the trumpet. I am going to his house on Saturday." What I thought would be a better subject turned to be even worse than the previous one.

"No you are not!"

"Yes I am. I never have any friends it is not fair!" I cried in frustration.

"He can be some sort of rapist or a demon. Yep he is most likely a demon." He said but it seemed more like he was thing out loud.

"He is not he is just a geek! Fine, can he come to the motel instead?" I asked and this time he finally looked my way and I just so happened to have my big puppy eyes staring back at him. And with an inner struggle that took about five minutes he finally gave in. I gave him a big hug around his neck but instead of a returned hug he just pushed me back and stared at the road. This was odd. Was Dean, my Dean mad at me? I drifted into my thoughts as we continued to our temporary home.

_**Okay, tell me what you think! I love reviews. If it is good tell me and I will continue to write it. If it is without hope tell me and I will delete it. My feelings will not be hurt. I hope I got the personality of young Sam correct. The personality will be a little different since it is girl Sam. Should I do Dean's point of view next chapter, let me know guys. **_


	2. Chapter 2

_**I just wanted to say thanks for all of my reviews. Your input is always appreciated. I am so sorry about some of the grammar. When I was writing it was 5 am and my boyfriend kept saying come to bed and stop with your sick habit. He just doesn't understand! I still don't own Supernatural if I did it would be awesome! **_

I kept staring straight at the ceiling never looking back at Dean. It has been three days since our first day of school and he just seems so angry. I called off Saturday with Brian. It just didn't seem right to have him over while Dean was being such an ass. Perhaps I was afraid for poor Brian's safety. My big brother can be a lot to handle. Today is Dean's eighteenth birthday and he stood looking at himself in the mirror checking to see if he looked good, I suppose.

He combed his hair just the way he wanted before giving the mirror a wink. "I am good looking son of a bitch." He said with one of his famous smirks. I rolled my eyes at his comment. Didn't he know I was still overly and obsessively consumed with anger towards him? Every time I talk to Brian, my only friend in the world he becomes the hulk. Talk about bipolar.

One moment he is helping me with my hair for school and the next he is distant towards me. He has been like this since I was turned twelve but not it has gotten worse. We will be playing around and laughing and then he gives me this look as he was ashamed, as if I have shamed him. It is true I haven't been a good daughter. I am always bickering with dad but I can't help it. It is in my nature, I was pre wired to rebel. But the mere thought of disappointing Dean, my big brother sends me to a state of dread. My greatest fear is not being killed by a deadly unspeakable evil monster but having my brother disown me. How messed up is that?

"Come on Sammy girl time for school." He said with his famous grin. With just one look I couldn't help but to forgive him right here and now.

"Do I have to go to school?" The question caused him to become shocked. I never missed school nor did I ever want to. I just couldn't bear another day in Miss Brown's class. I swear she has it out to get me.

"Are you sick?" He was actually concerned. His voice held compassion and worry. He ran towards my queen sized bed and felt my forehead. His hand felt so cold but soft resting on my skin. His eyes met mine and then he pulled away turning back to the full length mirror and turning his back on me.

"No Dean I am not sick, I just hate my first period teacher and thought since you are skipping today maybe I can too. I thought we could get breakfast for your Birthday before Uncle Bobby shows up."

But that was only half the truth because I don't feel well. I'm not sick as I have the sniffles sick but my stomach has been crapping since late last night. In the middle of my peaceful slumber I felt something wet and woke up covered in a deep crimson blood. I thought I have been stabbed but I wasn't in any sort of pain. I rushed to the bathroom and saw that my thighs were covered in blood, my blood. I wasn't dying as I first thought but instead I had reached womanhood and I wished I didn't.

Dean Of course didn't know any of this and he especially didn't know that I sneaked out at four this morning to the _Seven Eleven_ to pick up pads. I sneaked back in to our tiny old motel room cleaned myself up and put a fresh clean towel over the dried stain then went straight back to dream land.

"I am skipping because I am working a case in town. Dad is doing a job of his own somewhere so Bobby needed a partner. You are taking your little ass to school."

I walked out of our old and smelly motel room making sure I slam the door loudly enough for Dean to hear. Actually I slammed it so loud everyone in Miami could hear. Maybe I was acting like a baby but I can't take it anymore. He is driving me completely insane! He is keeping me at a distance and I am going to find out just why. I am going to ask him why after his birthday dinner tonight. Uncle Bobby is taking us out to some nice restaurant to celebrate Dean's birthday. If he doesn't tell me then I am just going to have to beat it out of him. That thought made a grin to appear on my face. Dean Winchester you have met your match!

The drive to school was once again met with silence. I hate fighting with him but sometime I just want to punch him in the face. He can be such a jerk! Dean kept looking straight ahead never turning to see me glaring but he knew that I was. I he always knows when I am around or when I am staring at him. This wasn't the best way to start his birthday. Come on Sam be nice. I told myself.

"Dean I am sorry I was being a Bitch. Happy birthday big brother" I said with a smile.

With a few a moments he finally looked at me and smiled back. He gave me a smile that could melt any girl's heart. No wonder Dean was so good with the ladies. I would kill a thousand evil monsters just to see him smile every day. He has been my brother, my mother, and my father since I could remember. I wish he could have had a normal childhood instead of being a parent to me and even a parent to dad. The thought of dad reminded me that he won't be here for Dean's birthday. He love's that man. He practically worships him and here I am soiling his birthday already. Great good going Sam, I am the worst sister ever.

"It's okay Sammy girl. All it is good. I am an adult today. I have my first real case and later on we are going to have pie." He spoke to me as if nothing happened.

"What is the case about anyways?" I asked eagerly.

"Three girls claimed being raped."

"That doesn't sound very supernatural. It just sounds terrible."

"Yeah that's what I said too but they also claim that when they looked up their attacker vanished." His voice was like a little kid on Christmas day. I could defiantly tell that he was excited. This will be the first time he went without dad. I guess it made him fell like a grownup. Dean id legal now and I don't want to imagine what kinds of trouble he will get in too.

We pulled up at school five minutes late. Damn, Miss Brown is going to kill me! Well, she is just going to have to wait. I reached over and placed a soft kiss on his right check and rushed out of the car. Out of the corner of my eye I could have sworn I saw Dean holding his cheek where I had kissed it and then he drove away like a bat out of hell.

The day went better than I thought. Miss Brown was still out to get me but she wasn't as bad today. My cramps began to fade away so that made things more enjoyable for me. Earlier I wish I had been stabbed then this! Dean was lucky he wasn't born a girl.

I was so ready for school to end that I didn't notice that Brian wasn't here until last period. I hope he isn't sick. I will give him a call when I get home. I don't have too much homework which is good. It is Friday after all but I do enjoy it. I know I am a geek but that has always been just fine with me. The last period bell rang and I hopped out of my desk and hurried outside to wait for Dean. When I got outside to the front of the school it wasn't the Impala that pulled up beside me but Uncle Bobby's old pickup truck.

I got inside of the truck and hugged Uncle Bobby. He smelt like candy and whisky. He was hunter like my dad and a grumpy old drunk by I love him. His house is the place I call home. He has done a lot of babysitting for us back in the day and he even taught me how to shoot.

"It is good to see you Sam. You have gotten even prettier. I bet Dean is going to have some problem keeping the boys away from you." His word caused me to blush. I felt suck like a stupid little girl.

"Thanks Bobby but I can take care of myself."

"I'm sure you can. Your father is John Winchester. He trained you just as good as Dean, maybe even better." He said as he gave me a wink.

"Where is Dean?" I asked. He did say he was picking me up. I am glad to see my Uncle Bobby I just couldn't help but to be disappointed.

"Oh, umm well" He looked as if he didn't want to tell me where he was but after a moment I knew. Dean was at a strip club. He was eighteen now and of course he would go. He has been many times before with his fake I.D but now he can go whenever he wants.

"He is at a strip club isn't he?" I gave him a look that said, tell me now or you will regret it late.

"How did you know?"

"Because I know my brother." I said with a laugh. Yep, I know him better then he knows himself. I just spent fourteen years of my whole life watching him, looking up to him, hell even trying to be him. I know my big brother and he knows me.

Bobby and I stopped at this antique shop that sells a lot of amulets, relics, things of those sorts. He said he needed to pick up something for the case they were on. This place was amazing! It looked more like a wicca shop more than anything else. A heavy set woman in her mid 40's and curly jet black hair came out of the back room and greeted Bobby as if they were old friends. She handed him a small packed and he took it without even noticing I was there. I wonder what's inside of that small brown box.

I didn't think to hard about it because something in the glass counter caught my eye. It was an amulet of a face and for some reason I thought of Dean. "Hey lady, how much do you want for the necklace?" I yelled across the room. She looked at me and then towards the amulet and then once more back at me.

"Take it my child and give it to your bother." Her voice was raspy and deep. She sounded like a man more than anything. She opened the case and grabbed the necklace with the face and placed in my palm. Then she just walked off saying something I couldn't here. How could she have known this was for Dean and which one to grab? I never pointed to the one I wanted. Could she be a psychic?

I kept wondering about the lady in that shop as we drove back to the motel, my temporary home. It was just weird how she knew and how she gave me the amulet without asking me to pay. What was she saying when she walked away and what was in that package? I kept asking these questions over and over in my head. The whole thing seemed odd somehow.

I decided to do some homework. After two hours I was finally done with English, Algebra, World History, and Biology. I managed to get all of my homework completed and Dean was still not home. Then I remembered Bobby telling me that he was going to meet us at the restaurant that he got tied up. People really shouldn't tell me things while I do homework. I am too distracted to pay attention.

Bobby bought me a dress for tonight. It was a plain pink halt summer dress. It is pretty I will admit but I dread wearing it. I have never worn a dress in my life! I am not a girly girl and dresses were never practical when your dad is training you to become a perfect little soldier. Suck it up and don't be a baby. You can look nice tonight. I told myself which gave me the confidence to go to the bathroom to put it on.

I stood in the mirror staring at myself for what seemed like hours. Surprisingly I didn't look bad. Hell, I even looked good! I stepped out of the bathroom smiling like a teenage girl. Wait I am a teenage girl. So this is how it feels to be one.

"Wow look at you little one. You don't look like an idjit." He said jokingly.

"Thanks Bobby for the dress. I love it."

He gave me a pat on the back and we headed to the pickup. It was much harder to get into the truck with the dress but I finally got inside after several failed attempts. It took twenty minutes to get to our distention. The restaurant was this fancy Italian place. Dean will be disappointed that he won't get pie after all. I don't know why Bobby wanted to take us here. It is too expensive and way fancy for our lot. We are hunters not some family from the suburbs.

I spotted Dean in the far corner waiting for us. I decided to leave Dean's present in our room. I wanted to give it to him when it was just the two of us. I also wanted to talk about what was up was going on with him. As we walked towards our table I happened to notice two teenage boys a little bit older than me was glancing my way. As if they were checking me out! If made me feel as if I was naked and I didn't like. I sat next to Dean and gave him a hug but he pushed me back and gave me one good look. His face was beat red with anger.

"What the fuck are you wearing?" He asked as he stared at my dress.

_**Yay chapter two is done! I am sorry it wasn't Dean's POV but I just like writing Sam and I didn't want to rush it. I want you guys to figure out what's going on with Dean first. I hope he doesn't sound to mean he is just jealous. Opps I told oh well. Please review!**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**Thank you everyone for my reviews! I am sorry this chapter is so late! I had finals and then the holidays. It seemed I never had any time. I hope you like this chapter. I do not own anything this is just for fun. **_

At that moment I felt as if I was on the verge to cry. My eyes began to be clouded with salty liquid and any moment I knew tear drops would soon roll down my cheek. How could he be so cruel? Dean saw the hurt in my face, the pain he caused by his choice of words.

"What is your problem, boy?" Bobby asked. Dean didn't respond but continued to look at me.

Uncle Bobby seemed furious with my older brother for talking to me in such a way. His eyes glared at Dean with anger and disappointment. I could tell he wanted to yell at him till hell froze over but decided against it. I figure the reason must have been because we were in public place filled with civilians. We didn't need or want them in our messed up family business but I didn't seemed care up at this point. If Bobby wasn't going to lash out at Dean, I sure was.

"It is a dress Dean. I though you would know one since you have been under every girl's at school!" I wasn't silent when I said these words. I allowed my anger to show to Dean and as well as to everyone in the restaurant.

"I know what it is, Sam. I just don't understand why you are wearing one. People are looking at you."

"They are looking at me because I am yelling!" This was true. They did not care that I had on a dress that was age appropriate. It went passed my knees and it didn't reveal anything that shouldn't be revealed.

"You need to go back to the motel and put some fucking jeans and a shirt on!" This time he yelled back. His deep husky voice was even louder than my own.

"No." I said with a strong determination on my face. Dean looked as if he was in complete and utter shock. I never once in my fourteen years of life told Dean that two syllable word, no. To dad I said it all the time that it even became a daily ritual of mine but never to Dean, never to my Dean.

The word that I had spoken gave me power like anything else before. I had stood up to my brother, my protector and God it feels good. He deserves it too. I couldn't help not to feel angry and upset and the desire to hurt him as he has hurt me. Perhaps it was just because I was on my period. I had heard that you become overly emotional or it could just be I am sick and tired of being treated in this way!

"No? What do you mean by no?" He lifted his right eyebrow as he asked the question. Well, more like yelled it.

"I think you know what no means." I crossed my arms and took my battle stance.

His eye twitched in a nagging frustration and by this time we had a good size audience. People in the restaurant stared gawking as they waited for the next scene in our sibling feud to unravel. Even Uncle Bobby just sat there across from us not saying a word. He was motionless. If I didn't know any better I would say he has gone stiff and died.

"You have to do what I tell you too." Dean was now in a complete baffled and angry state that I was somewhat scared.

"No I don't" I replied with a bold voice. I may be a little frightened but I will never back down from my post, my battle stance. I again said that word, _no_ and again it felt liberating.

"Yes you do because I am the oldest and you have to do what I tell you." He was completely full of himself but that is one of the many reasons why I admire and love him.

I didn't say a word but instead I grabbed the cherry pie that was brought to replace the cake for Dean's birthday and planted it right in his pretty face. I stomped off right after with Uncle Bobby following behind. Dean still sat in his chair whipping pie crust and cherries off his skin. He muttered something that sounded like _son of a bitch._

Bobby laughed his old drunk ass off the whole ride back to the motel. I have to admit it was pretty damn funny when Dean got the pie to the face but I refused to grin. I want to stay mad! I am never angry with Dean too long. In matter of minutes I always forgive him but not this time. I refuse to be taken in by his witty charm and that devil may care attitude of his.

Uncle Bobby dropped me off to my room and head back to his. I wanted to stay with me but I assured him that I was fine. I was lying of course and he knew as well but he didn't protest that much and left me alone to cry. I screamed at the top of my lungs. I yelled horrid and vile things at Dean. Even though I knew he could not hear them it still felt good to let my frustration out.

I just couldn't wrap my brain around why he would get so unbelievable livid over a dress! It was just a dress. A simple cute dress and yet it didn't seem so simple. Was I missing something? I guess I was because it doesn't make any sensed that my brother would be angry at me over a damn dress!

I went over to the dresser and picked up Dean's present. I wanted to throw it at the tacky blue wall but I couldn't push myself to do it. It was for Dean and somehow it seemed that it was always meant and belonged to him.

The room was quite and I felt alone and the small motel room. Part me wished that I allowed Bobby to stay to keep me company. I thought about calling Brain but I wasn't sure if he was sick or not since he wasn't at school today. After a long pause of thinking of what I should do to entertain myself a wicked thought came to mind.

I turned on the TV with the over sized remote and flipped through the channels until I found what I was searching for. A naked woman with short bleach blonde hair bent over as a man was attacking her from behind. No, not attacking because she appeared to be enjoying it. I wanted to shut my eyes but I couldn't move or blink but I could do was to stare.

I never watched porn before. I didn't even know how sex was actually done. Every time Dad tried to breech the topic of sex with me he would just change the subject and turn away in utter defeat. Dean would just say, 'Sammy if you have sex with a guy you will get pregnant and you will die.' I think Dean was being a bit over dramatic. He has had sex since he was thirteen with over fifty girls and he has never once got them pregnant or they have died.

There I go thinking of Dean. I need to stop thinking and watch my porn because how else will I know about these things. The woman really did not seem to enjoy it very much but instead pretended too. Her big breast jumped up and down as the man went back and forth. I couldn't really see what he had inside her but whatever it was she moaning very. It seemed a bit too loud to be real. I still didn't get the whole reason for it. They were just putting on a show and I actually saw was a pair of breast and I see them every day in the locker room. My first porn video turned out to be a disappointment. The woman sounded like it was good but I couldn't believe her. Maybe sex it is not supposed to be for girls and only for men. If that it is the case I am never having sex because I don't want another person to have all the fun. If I can't enjoy it then no one is ever getting me to have sex.

After shutting the TV off I took off my dress and put on a pair of stripped boxers and I white tank and then climbed into my bed. I stayed awake for what appeared to be hours. I thought about many things but mostly about Dean. It was three in the morning and he still wasn't back. I told myself not to worry that he can take care of himself but I couldn't help not to. All there was left for me to do was to think about where he was. Unimaginable things popped into my head to explain on why he was late. A dragon could have scooped him up and he was taking him to his lair. They weren't very good or even likely possible explanations but I couldn't stop thinking them.

Finally I let the sand man to take me. I felt cold fingers around on my face. My sleepy eyes opened to see Dean staring down at me and his breath stunk with liquor. I wanted to roll on my side and go back to sleep but he stood on top of my stomach refusing me to turn over to go back to slumber land. I was about to tell him that his bed was over there but then he began to speak.

"Me and you Sammy are like two halves and we make whole." His speech was slow and muffled, he is extremely drunk. If I let him to continue he will eventually go away and allow me to go back to sleep.

"We are more than just brother and sister. You are mine and I am yours." This was true and we have always known this but why is he saying these things. Mostly when he wakes me up when he is drunk he tells me about the women he just fucked not to discuss our sibling relationship.

"But you can't have her Dean. No never can have what you want." He was now talking to himself. This is just great. He got himself hammered and come morning I am going to have to be there holding his hand as he barfs his whiskey into the toilet. It doesn't matter if I am angry with him or not I will always hold his hand while he has a hangover. It is our sibling tradition.

"Be a good little soldier for your daddy and that is that. Kill the evil sons of bitches but never be happy. Can't touch. Can't hold. You will hurt the one thing you love more than yourself." With that final phrase he collapsed right on top of me. I tired pushing him to the floor but he was so massive he wouldn't budge. He snored loudly in my ear as he ran his fingers though my hair just as he did when I was little girl. I too drifted back to sleep but not before thinking about what my brother said in his drunken state.


End file.
